East Tennessee Media Archives

November 26, 2008

I’m going to take a slight break from sports to just think about what I like most about off-days and holidays, which is being able to catch up on movie watching or sit back and watch my favorites.

Not all of these are “holiday” movies, but some of them sure are.

n “Groundhog Day” – How can you not love a flick where a guy kills himself day after day after day and keeps coming back? Plus Bill Murray offs Punxsutawney Phil in one scene and you know that grated on animal rights’ activists.

n “Ferris Bueller’s Day Off” – Probably one of my all-time favorites. This took playing hooky to another level. Also co-starred the lovely Mia Sara, which isn’t a bad thing at all.

n “Dead Poet’s Society” – For those of you that are fans of “House” on Fox TV you should check this one out to see Wilson (Robert Sean Leonard) in his much younger years. The one scene that always pumps me up is when the school’s class clown punches the class snitch right in the mouth near the end of the flick; just the same way it did in 1989.

n “Highlander” – Five words are all that you need; “There can be only one.” Too bad they didn’t stop with only one. They all get weirder as they go in this series.

n “House Party” – I have to credit my boy Pete Turley for getting me hooked on the Kid-N-Play movies from the late 80s to the early 90s. This one is the first of a trilogy (which actually spawned a fourth, but I’ll never watch it) and brings out a lot of little-known R&B and early Hip Hop artists. This film also launched Martin Lawrence’s career and the third installment gave us the late Bernie Mac at his absolute funniest.

n “White Christmas” – Good ol’ Bing Crosby croons while a young Rosemary Clooney swoons…eventually. Just the thought of Christmas in Vermont sounds great, but I’m not keen on really cold weather in the northeast. And Al Gore thinks that there’s “climate change” going on…

n “Elf” – Whether or not you like Will Ferrell this movie is great, but I’m sure there more folks that like Will than there are that don’t. Maple syrup on spaghetti is a little much and Bob Newhart as an elf is a little weird, but in all the movie is cool.

n “The Patriot” – Regardless of the historical accuracy of the film this one is a great one to put in and just stretch out and enjoy.

n “Gladiator” – Russell Crowe doing the world a favor and killing Joaquin Phoenix…umm…I mean Maximus killing Commodus is a great way to kill two hours.

n “Apollo 13” – I’m a big fan of any movies that deal with space…that are somewhat conceivable…and a great movie based on the true story of the days that led up to and went on during the missed attempt at a lunar landing are just the thing to sit back and get riveted to.

n “National Lampoon’s Vacation” – This could be either the original, the European, Vegas or the Christmas vacation, but in any event how can you not laugh at the bumbling Clark W. Griswold and his antics? In particular his kidnapping of his boss for giving him a “Jelly of the Month” membership instead of a Christmas bonus was just one of the truly great screwball moments in movie history.

n “Caddyshack” – Not only one of the best sports movies of all time, but one of the better comedies of all time and why not? Chevy Chase as the eccentric Zen Buddhist hot-shot golfer who doesn’t keep score, Bill Murray as the kooky assistant groundskeeper and the incomparable Ted Knight as Judge Smales. Who wants a Fresca?

n “Troy” – I know a lot of critics didn’t like this movie because it was so fraught with inaccuracies, but this epic is a great way to knock out three hours if you’re not watching football. Plus Eric Bana as Prince Hector is close to spot on and believable even if Brad Pitt as Achilles isn’t.

n “Casino Royale” – Any Bond flick for me is a good way to occupy two hours. The most recent one to DVD is one of my favorites. I would also recommend “From Russia With Love,” “You Only Live Twice,” “Thunderball,” and “Goldfinger.”

n “Swordfish” – It’s a little rough for most folks probably, but Hugh Jackman is one of my favorite actors. He’s definitely not going to be only known for playing Wolverine in the X-Men movies. Oh yeah and Halle Berry is really good looking!

n “Remember The Titans” – High school football movies don’t get better than this one based on a true story. This is the anti-“Varsity Blues.” Great story with great actors.

n “Holiday Inn” – Bing Crosby debuts the Irving Berlin classic Christmas tune “White Christmas.” Fred Astaire plays the weasely so-called friend as well as any one. The scenes where they do songs based on Lincoln’s birthday and Washington’s birthday are corny and over-the-top, but hey this was back in the 50s in black and white and they were innocent then.

n “Fred Claus” – My wife and I saw this last year and fell over laughing in the theater. Paul Giamatti as Santa is a trip, but Ludacris as an elf is even funnier! Oh yeah and Vince Vaughn does his usual thing.

n “Trading Places” – Christmas and New Year’s Day surround the timeframe for this movie, but it’s all about the comedy of Eddie Murphy and Dan Akroyd. Some goofball liberal talk show hack wannabe named Al Franken (which by the way will be the ONLY mention of him in one of my blogs ever) does a little bit-part as a stoner baggage handler. This guy wants to be a senator. Jesse Ventura as governor is one thing, but the four-eyed, leftist numbskull who’s neither funny nor overly bright as senator is another. Minnesotans aren’t that dumb are they?

n “Bull Durham” – Quite possibly one of Kevin Costner’s best roles is here as Crash Davis. This guy’s a walking quote machine. The dialogue in this one is something else. Any movie where “lolligaggers” is used is just a great film. That and the repeated use of the phrase “meat” in reference to hot shot pitching prospect Ebby Calvin “Nuke” LaLoosh make this a must-have.

“n JFK” – While I admit that a conspiracy theory into the assassination of Jack Kennedy being made into a movie is gripping theater, the whole thing relies on assumption and circumstantial evidence at best. Still, Costner and Tommy Lee Jones give great performances as do Joe Pesci, Gary Oldman and Donald Southerland in a bit-role.

n “Youngblood” – While I’m not a fan of hockey I like this movie about a hot shot minor league hockey player. Rob Lowe isn’t that believable as a hockey player because he’s too skinny, too pretty and…well plenty of other reasons, but Patrick Swayze as the cagy veteran mentoring the young Dean Youngblood is a saving grace in this film. Oh and Cynthia Gibb is in the movie and she’s not hard to look at.

n “Gross Anatomy” – This little-known flick is a cool story about med school students working to become doctors. Matthew Modine is the know-it-all wanting to be a doctor because of the pay. Daphne Zuniga is the love interest who isn’t interested in love at first. The movie is a heartstring-puller in parts and needs an interpreter of medical terminology in others, but this is a good film that’s not that well-known.

n “Patch Adams” – What I love most about Robin Williams’ movies is he always manages to make you laugh at some point. He’s great at comedy naturally and does pretty well in dramas. This is the latter as is “Dead Poets Society.” If you’ve not seen it you should.

n “Batman Begins” – I liked the Michael Keaton “Batman” movie…the first one where Jack Nicholson played The Joker. The second one with Danny DeVito as The Penguin was a little hard to stomach. After that they got ridiculous with anatomically-correct neoprene Batsuits, Robin and Batgirl as well as the villains. Christian Bale gives the Batman franchise a fresh start and he is great at it. The Scarecrow is just creepy enough to be believed and Liam Neeson (whom I’ve always liked in just about any movie) gives a brilliant performance as Ra’s al Ghul. Brilliant all the way around.  

November 18, 2008

Do the media honks and Tennessee not get it? I’ll give you the particulars folks. Read this slowly…WE DO NOT WANT BRIAN KELLY AT UT.

Yes, Cincinnati will in all likelihood win the Big Least…ERR…East. Yes, Kelly has done a great job to this point. Let’s look at the rest of the story.

He is playing with a ton of Mark D’Antoni’s players. D’Antoni now coaches in East Lansing where the bigger boys play. When Kelly was at Central Michigan, yes he did get them to a bowl game, but again with another coaches’ players. He spent 13 seasons at Division II Grand Valley State in Michigan, where he won a pair of national titles. He’s paid his dues, but he’s not paid his dues to get a shot coaching in the SEC. He’s not proven himself to the point where he’s got enough wherewithal to handle recruiting the bigger name kids in the south let alone on a national basis. He’s not the fit for this program.

For the idiots that think he’s the equivalent to Bruce Pearl…please put down the crack pipe or whatever else you’re smoking. Pearl is a great fit at UT…now. In three year’s time we’ll see how the wolves are reacting if the Vols still haven’t made it out of the Sweet 16…or the first time an injury or string of injuries puts UT in a losing season.

Someone established with roots in the south (better yet with Tennessee roots) needs to be the replacement for Fulmer. Kelly is a guy who’s always going to be talked about for openings for head coaches…the term my esteemed goobery colleague used for it is “R” rated, so I’ll leave that alone and instead be “G” rated and call Kelly a coaching mercenary.

Phillip Fulmer gave a lot of great years to the program. The next guy should at least be able to give us five. Kelly doesn’t fit that mold.

November 5, 2008

I’m not going to make any bones about this. I’m a Phillip Fulmer guy. I’ve been a Vol fan all my life, but I’m ashamed today for the way the University of Tennessee handled all the struggles this season.

Athletic director Mike Hamilton should be drug into the middle of Neyland Stadium, tarred and feathered and then removed from his position. That’s appropriate. If the way that this man handles the tough times is indicative of how he’s going to handle future tough times then give me someone with some more intestinal fortitude.

Hamilton was hand-picked by Doug Dickey then was selected by a committee to become the AD and in the first few years Rod Delmonico has been replaced (but I’m not complaining about that), Buzz Peterson has been replaced (I was a little skeptical to begin with, but I’ve completely bought into Bruce Pearl as the MAN for the Vol basketball program) and now the search will be on to replace the man who’s team is the very backbone of the entire UT Athletic Department.

Rotsa ruck Mike. You blow this hire and you’ll be the one looking for a job.

But back to Fulmer, the man with a 150-51 record at present, a pair of SEC titles and a national title, having to deal with the pressures from wherever about becoming more diverse offensively and embracing the spread and look where it got him. He goes and hires a greenhorn offensive coordinator who can’t get our offense going with quarterbacks that had exactly one game’s worth of starting experience (and that was only because of an injury) and all of the brilliant football minds around the Knoxville area and even some know-it-alls out in Memphis and points beyond said it was past time for a change…even years in the making for this moment.

I say…where have you been all those years? There was no mention of this even being a possibility until 2005 when the Vols lost to Vandy, finished 5-6 and went to no bowl game for the first time since 1989. Only when Fulmer had a losing record overall which most of his predecessors with the exception of Bill Battle (who was also unceremoniously removed for…what was it again? Oh yeah, Johnny Majors was fresh off a national title in Pittsburgh) did everyone start making waves about it being time to find a successor to one of the top coaches in the nation over the last two decades.

That list includes Bowden Wyatt, Doug Dickey, Majors and yes Vol fans even the General had a couple of down years. And all the talk about this potentially being the worst season in Tennessee history is misleading as well. The possibility of the worst season since joining the SEC is more to the point, but with wins over Wyoming, Vandy, Kentucky and perhaps a bowl win a 7-6 campaign is salvageable. It’s could be 5-7 with either Vandy getting their second win in four years or Kentucky getting their first win since the Reagan era, but I’m a heck of a lot more optimistic than that. November has always been Tennessee’s month to shine and I expect a lot more out of the Vols when the head coach is on his way out.

All you have to do is look back to last season in Michigan when Lloyd Carr was basically done the same way. The team rallied around him to beat Florida in the Capital One Bowl. His crime was not beating Ohio State in a very long time, but losing to Appy State sure didn’t help. What’s his replacement done this season? Rich Rodriguez has lost to Toledo for crying out loud and they’re looking like they’ll have their worst record in school history without some sort of miraculous turnaround.

Washington? After Don James left no one has been able to duplicate his success and that means that Ty Willingham is who we thought he was; an average head coach when not given much in the way of resources to go on.

Syracuse? While my esteemed goobery colleague didn’t like Paul Pasqualoni a lot most of the folks in upstate New York would be glad to have him back after what’s gone on recently.

If Fulmer does decide to go elsewhere (because of the way he was turned out by Hamilton and very likely to a greater extent by Jim Haslam, who should really concentrate more on keeping the prices on the fuel he peddles lower and not on the hiring/firing of coaches) and I hope that he does, let it be to somewhere in the region. I like him to go to Clemson. He doesn’t have to change his shade of orange, but will have to do something about the purple they like to bring out from time to time. Also I guarantee they’d welcome him with open arms since for the 10-12 years before Tommy Bowden and Steve Spurrier got the head coaching jobs at Clemson and South Carolina respectively Fulmer went into the Palmetto State with great regularity and plucked up the state’s top recruits. You don’t think Clemson would bend over backwards to have one of the top recruiters in the country (still) running their program?

What about all the commitments of what was going to be a dazzling recruiting class? They follow Fulmer to wherever he goes and like that they make the team contenders.

So while I will reserve final judgment on whether or not I remain a Vol fan following this injustice of grand proportions I will do all I can to point out that Fulmer has a lot left to give to college football other than an administrative position and that Brian Kelly up here at the University of Cincinnati is NOT a guy we want at Tennessee.

Mark my words…if Kelly is hired at UT then I’m done. I’ll go from being a guy who admires Penn State from afar to being a new fan eager to redecorate his office with Navy and White.

Finally, I have interviewed Coach Fulmer one-on-one and feel a little bit of a connection. Of the two highest profile sports figures I’ve interviewed (Rusty Wallace was the other) I can say that both where pleasant, engaging and definitely not acting like it was a chore to talk to a guy from a rinky-dink local newspaper. I’ve interviewed youth league and high school coaches with bigger egos than Fulmer. I was deeply saddened and was at the point of tears myself when he started breaking down in his press conference. My wife asked if I was OK, I said yes, but just to be safe we might think about making plans to redecorate the office in the future.

God bless you Coach Fulmer. I hate what we’ve done to you.

October 15, 2008

Psychos with microphones…and laptops, and Web sites and columns

Ya know Bob Davie really ought to be thankful to a lot of folks that he has a job. He needs to thank Lou Holtz for retiring the first time and being given the reins of “America’s College Football Team” (the once-mighty and all-powerful Notre Dame) without much more than a rubber stamp. He also needs to thank the folks at the ESPN family of networks and ABC for looking beyond his deficiencies as a football coach on said team and elsewhere for that matter to get a job as a color analyst.

He needs to not question coaches in the game today because he’s sure not going to get a sniff at one of the jobs that might come open in the future. For example during the Oklahoma State win over Missouri this past weekend Davie ripped into Cowboys’ head coach Mike Gundy for not being along the sidelines during a defensive series and being over on the bench. Davie is probably a bit jealous because he didn’t think of it first, his background as a defensive coordinator, or because he never began a season 6-0.

Whatever the case I’d like to give Davie a Shut The Hell Up prescription and tell him to take it twice a day every day except for Saturdays when he needs to double that…and continue until further notice.

n If in the opinion of some of Tennessee newspapers’ sports editors is that a change is needed at UT with head coach Phillip Fulmer either stepping down or being unceremoniously fired then I’d like to counter with an opinion of my own: the sports editors of these publications need to also step down.

Having been familiar with the writings of News-Sentinel hack John Adams for many moons this tone of his these days isn’t that different from 20 years ago when Johnny Majors was in the midst of an 0-6 start in 1988. Adams’ assertion that the contract extension given to Fulmer last season giving him a guaranteed raise for winning eight games this season is about as ludicrous as it gets. That sentiment was echoed by Pat Forde from ESPN.com. Ron Higgins from the Commercial Appeal in Memphis has said it’s time for the University to pony up the $6 million buyout.

To Adams and Forde my contention is that Fulmer got this extension worded like that because with this squad having to break in a new quarterback and a new offensive coordinator while being in the SEC getting eight wins would be quite a feat. Losing the opener to UCLA has been a hard pill to swallow, but the fact remains that Fulmer has earned the right to get this fixed and if they do get to eight wins then Tennessee has beaten either a No. 1 or No. 2 Alabama team in the process of doing such. I’d like to see the boosters try to force him out after beating Alabama, whom some still consider more important that beating Florida or Georgia.

To Higgins my contention is that the athletic department has been through two basketball coaches’ buyouts and in the process has had to take money from revenues brought in and allocated to the football program. While a buyout seems like a good idea to him and possibly to some “fans,” does an exponential increase in tickets and concessions sound like a good idea? I mean you’re now paying $70 for tickets to the marquee games, $50 to the middle-tier games and $40 for the lower tier and that’s to pay for all the programs, the Neyland Stadium renovation and what-not. They’ll go up a minimum of $10 more per game if Fulmer is bought out. Do you honestly think the athletic department will lower the prices back after the buyout is paid off?

 My thinking is that none of these three hacks have ever coached a game in college, so for them to throw out the assertion that Fulmer should be replaced is laughable. I feel like I’m beating a dead horse here, but get over it guys. You’re selling papers, but your inner-most desires are getting the best of you and wishful thinking will only make you go crazy. Maybe you should all look in the mirror and take a hard look at what you have to offer every weekend to your subscribers. I daresay you should step down at the end of the year and do the paper a favor…if you indeed love the paper.

October 2, 2008

I’m not a Raiders’ fan. I don’t think I’ve ever pulled for them in the least. I don’t see the appeal. I wonder why my wife’s brother-in-law chooses to be a fan of theirs.

I’m guessing it was because he was trying to be a front-runner back when the Silver and Black last won a Super Bowl. That’s been a generation ago and things couldn’t be wackier than they are now.

For months we’ve all been waiting for the hammer to fall on embattled Raiders’ coach Lane Kiffin and finally it did. Egomaniacal owner Al Davis had went to the extreme of drafting a resignation letter for Kiffin months ago, but the coach scoffed and went on.

Earlier this season Kiffin practically begged, dared, whatever you want to call it he asked to be replaced if he wasn’t the guy. So his club goes out and wins one they had a chance to win against Kansas City then loses a close one to a much better Buffalo team and yet another one to the defending conference champion San Diego Chargers.

The solution you ask? Tom Cable: a former head coach at the University of Idaho with a career mark of 11-35. Great choice Al. That whole slogan you have for the organization “Commitment to Excellence” might as well be “Commitment to Excrement” because that whole deal stinks like the Rutledge Water Treatment plant on a warm night in late August. I’ll be gentle though and say “Commitment to Mediocrity” because the Raider Nation is getting a bad product year in and year out.

The blame goes on Davis, not Kiffin. Davis is the owner, president and general manager. He’s made the draft picks for years. He was fortunate to catch lightning in a bottle with a career year out of Rich Gannon to get them into the Super Bowl only to get pole-axed by former head coach Jon Gruden and the Tampa Bay Buccaneers.

Al needs to follow the path of George Steinbrenner. Get out now while you still have a modicum of respect and let someone younger handle things. “Just win baby” ain’t cutting it anymore.

September 25, 2008

That big yell you heard coming from near the Canadian border was the sound of the dozens of Lions’ fans that still exist voicing their delight that the Matt Millen debacle is over. This move is about three years beyond what should’ve been allowed.

Let’s look at it like this; if the Lions were the Yankees Millen would’ve been out the door at the same time as former head coach Marty Mornhinweg was given his pink slip. After all the M&M boys came in at the same time.

Ah…good ol’ Moron-weg. He was 5-27 in two seasons in Detroit, made probably the dumbest decision in overtime that was ever made by electing to kick off citing the wind being a factor and also declining a penalty that would’ve given the Lions the ball after the Bears had punted which also happened during overtime.

Yeah it’s tough to be easy on a guy who hires a former back-up QB from the Arena League and who was the head coach at the mighty University of Montana.

Millen has been living on borrowed time for years. It’s been enough for Lions’ fans to pine for Wayne Fontes. Barry Sanders probably would’ve still been around if Wayne was.

September 23, 2008

Right now folks I’ve about had it with all the “fans” wanting Phillip Fulmer to step down.

Just stop it. STOP IT! Right now just hold your tongues and please keep your IQ’s to yourselves because every time you open your mouth your IQ dips to the levels of Forrest Gump.

A head coach with 101 more wins than losses, a pair of SEC championships and a national title has earned the right to leave whenever he pleases. That’s right folks…WHENEVER HE PLEASES.

The only coach in UT history with more wins than Fulmer is that guy they named the stadium after. It’s a good possibility that Gen. Neyland will keep the record because Fulmer is going to be 60 years old in 2010. Odds are he might just take a position in the athletic department prior to or immediately following the 2010 season or whenever his current contract expires. He’s probably more than ready to just play Papaw to his new grandbaby than to listen to all your whining and moaning.

You know who you are. You’re the guys in Section C midway up that claim you know “exactly” what plays that are being run by the offense and that they are too predictable. The same ones that weren’t happy when Johnny Majors was “ungraciously” forced out after losing three straight games during the 1992 season following off-season heart surgery and thought that Fulmer went behind his back to secure the job.

You’re also the one calling into Vol Calls with the stones to ask Fulmer what it would take for him to step down.

I’m going to tell you what it would take; something along the lines of what Mike Price did at Alabama before he even coached a game.

Now then, I don’t like him not taking more ownership over what’s been happening early on because he knew he was rolling the dice getting an offensive coordinator who was a head coach at a I-AA school. He also knew he wasn’t going to have a reliable starting quarterback coming in. He probably also was fully aware that the defense isn’t anywhere near the level it was as few as five years ago.

What are your options? You can shut that mouth of yours and support this team, or you can keep on being the jerks you’ve been being the last eight or so years and let your vitriol spew. In any event Mike Hamilton isn’t going to get rid of Fulmer and that’s that.

Something Fulmer needs to do desperately is get rid of Larry Slade as the defensive backs coach (because the talent that those guys have isn’t being utilized as it should) and tell the Chief (defensive coordinator John Chavis) that he’s got until the end of the year to get things straightened out or else he’ll be joining Slade on the unemployment line.

Now then…I feel much better having said that.

September 8, 2008

Sigh!

Folks, you’ll never know just how much I missed being at the Grainger Grizzlies’ first-ever home opener last Friday night. According to my mother the home stands were jam packed and more than half of the visitors stands were too. From talking to the regulars from years of Rutledge games I’m sure the spots on the fence around the field were taken up as well.

I just wanted to be there. It gets worse being in Ohio every year that high school football starts up again. I was a part of the Friday nights in Rutledge for many years and now all I can do is call up and see what’s going on. It’s just not the same.

Speaking of the game, the Grizzlies won their first ever contest and it was an all-important regional match-up with Pigeon Forge. It was also head coach Mark Briscoe’s first win as a head coach. The former Carson-Newman All-American has waited a long time to be calling the shots after being retired head coach Mark Hammer’s offensive coordinator for the past decade.

Briscoe has been a good friend of mine for the last 10-12 years. He’s been good for the community and the kids. During the All Sports Banquet to close out the Rutledge Pioneers’ history books, Briscoe, who is originally from Virginia but has been as true blue as anyone can be, said as much when he talked about how he would miss the royal blue and white. However he also said it was indeed an exciting time beginning the Grizzly athletic program.

So far so good coach: keep it up!

September 5, 2008

I’ve about had it with the antics of the artist formerly known as Chad Johnson.

For those of you that care enough to read the news from the NFL or get regular fantasy football updates, Cincinnati’s resident motor-mouthing, showboating wide receiver has had his name legally changed to Chad Ocho Cinco. Now even for those of you that don’t speak any Spanish I’d say you do know that ocho is the word for eight and cinco is the word for five. (You have seen Sesame Street before haven’t you?)

Well first off C.O.C., your number, 85, is not spelled that way in the language that is forced upon the American public about as much as homosexuality is in the TV programs of today’s society…careful, I might begin to ramble off some on different issues I don’t really want to be on right now. It’s ochenta y cinco. Ochenta is Spanish for eighty. “Eight five” is Chad formerly Johnson’s last name now literally.

He also made up some crap about giving his kid a name of a colossally stupid nature. I have to walk a thin line here, but at some point don’t you get sick of this nonsense?

I think I want to change my name to Kip Winger. There’s no real reason these days, but back when I was in high school it was because my friends and I always surmised that the front man for the rock band that sported his last name turned down more women in a day than we would ever get to in five lifetimes. Now he’s been out of the public eye for quite some time, wears glasses and looks like he’s put on weight…so much for the rock and roll life.

We’re now subjected to a full season of Ocho Cinco B.S. It’ll be worse than it was before because it’s now going to be on the back of his jersey and not fined for uniform policy violation.

I miss “He Hate Me.” Vince McMahon has got to be loving this script.

September 2, 2008

I have to admit I was a little more than disappointed when I woke up at 3 A.M. to get ready for work and saw my text message updating the outcome of Tennessee’s football game.

WHAT THE?

I went to sleep with the Vols leading and UCLA coach Rick Neuheisel giving the old rah-rah speech to Holly Rowe on the sideline going in. His starter at quarterback by default had just slung his fourth interception of the half resulting in a touchdown to give Tennessee the lead.

And he didn’t bat an eye…what is this crap? A coach who’s left a trail of violations behind him at every college stop, just got through being involved with one of the worst offenses in the NFL in Baltimore and his 3^rd string, JUCO transfer has tossed four picks in the first half and they’re just hoping to keep it close?

“No way,” I thought. This is going to get ugly in the second half. I was right about ugly, but wrong in thinking no way.

However after three missed field goals (and another one that would’ve missed as bad as the others if not for a delay of game penalty), a missed call on a safety in the beginning of the fourth quarter and tons of penalties (nine is too many period and most of them were momentum killers), a shaky primetime start by a quarterback most people have tried to compare to the great Heath Shuler (not hardly, at least not yet) and that same secondary that looked like a quartet of All-Americans in the first 45 minutes only to look like food for the sharks lingering in the water (Florida and Georgia) in the final 15 minutes and overtime the Vols went down.

While extremely embarrassing and disheartening to some extent I’m not going to jump off the side of the double-decker bridge down by the Ohio River and I am definitely not calling for the resignation of any coaches (other than Larry Slade and issuing a warning to John Chavis to get it together in the end of games) nor am I giving up on the new offensive philosophy yet either (though Dave Clawson looked like he was outmatched in his primetime debut). I’m merely going to point out some obvious things.

Arian Foster needs to practice ball security drills at all times. I don’t care that he will break Travis Henry’s career mark for rushing yards by mid-October. What I do care about is that he puts the ball on the ground in bad situations. That fumble in the third quarter when the Vols could’ve delivered the knockout punch inside the UCLA five is markedly worse than the one he had two years ago in Tampa at the Outback Bowl against Penn State. He was a sophomore then. Now he’s a senior and seniors aren’t supposed to make plays like that when the chance is there to create some separation for a quarterback who’s not having a great passing game.

Well…I won’t rehash much more. The play selection was questionable. I understand trying to get Jonathan Crompton some game experience and work on some things, but 19-for-41 is too many passes if you’re leading most of the game. The Vols averaged 5.2 yards per carry and needed to run it a lot more (just not with the fullback).

Good news is there’s time to get things fixed before SEC play begins. Bad news is UAB isn’t exactly who you want to play when you’re working on things. UCLA is middle of the road in the Pac-10, but they were enough of a challenge to get ready for some of the stuff we’ll be looking at in the months to come.

Just so long as this fiasco doesn’t repeat itself.

8/19/08

For the life of me…and for that matter most people with a shred of common sense as well as football knowledge, I can’t fathom a reason for the Bengals to re-sign a player they released during the off-season because he can’t stay out of trouble.

Chris Henry is back in Bengals’ camp…today. With Chad “Ocho Cinco” Johnson and T.J. Houshmandzadeh both out with injuries and none of the draft picks getting up to speed Bengals’ owner Mike Brown has gone and done the unimaginable by bringing back Cincinnati’s poster child for how NOT to behave while not on the field.

Henry has been in and out of jail, court, controversy and the headlines for most of his four years in the league. He’s talented, yes, but he’s got more baggage than Delta carries on a holiday flight. He’s been a number three receiver for a good reason though. His off-the-field issues have made him unreliable to be counted upon during games. He’ll be starting the season with a 4-game suspension because he once again violated the NFL’s code of conduct policy.

Funny, but I remember Commissioner Roger Goddell saying he was on his last chance when he was serving an 8-game suspension to begin last season.

As it stands, the Bengals are no better off than a year ago and possibly could be worse. This is head coach Marvin Lewis’ last chance and Brown goes and gives him more distractions?

Isn’t T.J. being in a contract year enough of a distraction?

Isn’t Ocho Cinco whining about being traded and wanting to legally change his last name (among other things) enough of a distraction?

Isn’t getting belted by the Lions at home in preseason when the team looks lifeless enough of a distraction?

A new defensive coordinator isn’t going to get the job done in Cincinnati. It’s going to take two things to turn the Bengals around. Brown has to hire a general manager and then he needs to be hands off the everyday operations and personnel decisions of the club.

Until then the fans of the “WHO DEY?” mantra will suffer through mediocrity for many more years.

August 15, 2008

Folks, are you tired of this same crisis of conscience like I am every four years when we have a Presidential election?

Since the days of Ronald Reagan there hasn’t been a clear and concise (or truly worthy either) candidate for President. The first President Bush (George Herbert Walker, a.k.a. 41) gave us new taxes when he had said there would be no new taxes as well as a puppy of a Vice President with a penchant for trying to turn a meeting with an elementary school class into a spelling lesson.

Then there was eight agonizing years of Slick Willie (a.k.a. William Jefferson Clinton) who introduced us to the preposterous idea that oral sex was not really having sex with someone. I’ll try to be gentle with this, but if certain parts of the anatomy are involved then…well you get the idea. We have had moments of moral outrage because of such behavior from the most powerful man in the world not when he’s behind closed doors, but because of WHICH doors he was doing it behind.

The Republicans chose to run Bob Dole, the senior senator from Kansas who’s probably not as qualified for the Presidency as his wife Elizabeth is. He got the chance because most people felt that he was owed a shot having been a senator for 30 years.

Let me explain this as carefully as possible. Senators are legislators. They are under the legislative branch of our system of government. Congressmen and congresswomen on all levels also fall into this category. The President is the top of the executive branch. That also includes governors and mayors (both city and in counties in Tennessee now). Legislators make laws. Executive enact them.

Now then…with all that prior knowledge “W” (current President George Walker Bush) was qualified because he had been a governor previously. He also had serious flaws to overcome and though now he is in “lame duck” status the flaws are still there. The majority of Americans want conservatism to be prevalent in their leadership. Approval ratings for the President and congress are both pitifully low.

Which brings us to now and that is where we have two senators about to take each other on for the Presidency. One is a senior Republican senator that has been plenty willing to tell his own party to shove it to try and work with Democrats and more often than not liberals in the Democratic Party. The other one is the junior senator from Illinois: a state with an extremely shady political past. That same senator also has had less than one term in the U.S. Senate before he decided he wanted to run for President.

Remember my little civics lesson a couple of paragraphs prior to this one? Neither one has been in the executive branch of any form of government so neither is qualified. Keeping that in mind experience would have to win out in this race if for no other reason than the blatant misuse of power that is going to come with the liberals having control of the White House and both houses of Congress.

So…like I have done since 1996 I will hold my nose and pull the lever for the Republican candidate and hope for the best. I’m not a McCain guy, but I am for right now because I am definitely not an Obama guy and any vote that doesn’t go for McCain (say a third party) might as well be for Obama in this election.

NOW THAT WE HAVE CLEARED THAT UP

n Sports is so much more interesting than politics in some ways. Let’s take for example the U.S. vs. Cuba in Olympic Baseball. Did you see the 11^th inning?

Thanks to a new tie-breaking rule just recently approved the Cubans won 5-4. The new rule states that beginning in the 11^th inning of a tied game base runners will be placed on first and second base and the batting team can hit from any point in the lineup. Meaning that if your 8-9-1 hitters were due up you could say “no we’ll go 3-4-5.” It has to be one of the worst rules ever thought of for any sport. College overtime is kinda cool, but it does need some work. This international 11^th inning tie-breaker is garbage.

Oh…and USA skipper Davey Johnson is hot because one of his guys got nailed with a foul ball off of a bunt attempt, but claimed that the pitch was intentionally inside and tight because the batter cleared the fences earlier in the game. See…baseball’s “code” transcends the major leagues. Maybe the game is “global” as everyone wants to think now.

How about this: we invented it and we’re no longer that great at it so we get players from all over to come to the US to play it. Global is so apocalyptic sounding.

n Michael Freaking Phelps

Holy crap folks! Have you seen how far out in front he is when he’s breaking world records? It’s insane!

Now there are whispers of him not being on the level when he competes. This is the fate of all world class athletes in the face of the Barry Bonds/Roger Clemens/Marion Jones/former East German team exploits of the last 30-40 years. The crying shame is now everyone is second-guessing before it’s warranted.

Phelps is 23, 6-7 and has muscles most guys have never heard of because he swims. Swimming has long been documented as one of the best forms of exercise because of the muscle groups it works on. He’s the ultimate specimen of swimmer and regardless of what the disgruntled Mark Spitz says Phelps is far better than Spitz ever was. A former Olympic teammate of Spitz, gold-medal winner in his own right John Naber, said as much to the Associated Press.

You and I get two more chances to watch him in action before we’ll have to watch ESPN Classic or some other show about him to see it. I hope you’re at least somewhat interested enough to see a man take a crack at winning 8 gold medals in one Olympics.

August 11, 2008

Greetings y’all!

Well I’ve been in Cincinnati for my third baseball season and nothing shocks me anymore.

It all started when Jerry Narron was the manager. He lasted all of two years from the time he was brought in as an interim. Management and ownership at the time was in transition and he was on a short leash.

In 2006 the Reds had a little life in them. New owner Bob Castellini said he was bringing championship baseball back to Cincinnati. He hired a man that had been a big part of building the Minnesota Twins into a model of consistency in Wayne Krivsky to be the general manager.

They finished with a losing record, but only three and a half games behind the St. Louis Cardinals who went on to win the World Series. They did win the season series with the Cardinals that season and looked like a team with some potential even if there were holes to fill.

They acquired the rights to former first round selection of the Tampa Bay Rays, Josh Hamilton, in the off-season prior to the 2007 season. He had lots of baggage, but had looked like he was finally getting his life and career in order. Aaron Harang had become one of the National League’s best pitchers. The result was a record eight games worse than the past year. In the middle of it all Narron got the boot. Pete Mackanin got the interim job this time and though he kept the Reds afloat and instilled a little bit of discipline in the meantime it all went for naught when he was not kept on as the manager.

Instead former Giants and Cubs manager Dusty Baker got the nod.

To date, with arguably better pitching and the two best hitting prospects in the farm system now on the big club, the Reds are 15 games under .500 and 19.5 out of the division lead. The Reds to equal last season’s mark would need to go 23-20 the rest of the way and must go 30-13 from here on out to not have a ninth consecutive losing season…or something along those lines.

Oh yeah, and Krivsky got jettisoned off in favor of Walt Jocketty, who started off the season as an “advisor” to Castellini. Jocketty of course has been the architect of quite a few championship teams.

Did I also mention that Ken Griffey, Jr. is now a White Sox? And just today Adam Dunn was placed on waivers and claimed by Arizona?

It’s been ongoing all season long. Castellini is blowing up the thing and starting from scratch. Reds’ fans who have been miserable for years will have to continue to be miserable while the Brewers, who a few years ago couldn’t get out of their own way, and the loveable losers from the North side of Chicago, looking to break a 100-year curse that has endured a billy goat, an error by Leon Durham (among others) and some dude named Steve Bartman, dominate the division.

I listen to the talking heads in the market here on most days and the fans are outraged for good reason most of the time. However if the fans ever want a winner in this city again they’re going to have to do what no one else does anymore and that’s be patient. In this time of instant gratification and high speed Internet fans can’t wait long enough to see what misstep a manager will make or blast a player for making a “bone-headed” play.

Even so, it’s a painful reality that sports aren’t what they once were.

ELSEWHERE IN MY MIND

n I am waiting with baited breath for the home opener for the Grainger Grizzlies. I graduated from Rutledge and the school board in their infinite wisdom (even if it IS a decade later than it ought to have been) took the initiative to build a school for both the need now and for future generations. This place is impressive. It has state of the art in many areas and much larger and nicer facilities than before. Of course the price tag is a lot for the folks to swallow (thus my reasoning for saying this project is 10 years after it was first needed) and not everything got done according to what was drawn up.

There’s no pavement on the track, no lights at the baseball or softball fields and the soccer field is going to be a cooperative project along with The Church at Rutledge. (For those of you who are wondering about separation of church and state…which is NOT in the Constitution…ERRR…a topic for another time) the field is on adjacent property owned by the church and not on the campus. Anywho…

It’s been my contention that when I ran for school board the first time in 1996 after my mother resigned to take a position in the school system that this thing would’ve happened a lot sooner. A few others have other theories that my loss set in motion several other things in the county, but we’re not talking about conspiracy theories ya know?

n The Olympics in China…well…within 48 hours of the opening ceremonies two people are attacked randomly with one of them dying along with the assailant. Then there are allegations of using gymnasts who aren’t at least 16. Then there’s a smack-talking Frenchman getting some comeuppance from the US swim team in the 4x100 free relay during a world record time with the fastest ever anchor leg turned in by a swimmer that isn’t named Phelps. Then there’s Yao Ming being embarrassed in the opening round of the basketball tournament by the latest installment of Team USA and their multi-millionaires.

Then there’s the whole smog thing, or the human rights (or lack thereof) thing.

Whichever way you choose to look at it the Olympics are losing their luster. Before it was amateur competition at its finest, but now since the advent of sending pros to compete in team sports then individually as well there’s not a real unheralded hero to grab your attention.

Most of the world that watches it is probably just catching it in segments. It’s also hard to watch because it’s on during odd times since it’s already tomorrow in China.

n Speaking of basketball, can someone tell me what’s up with the pros chasing foreign currency all of a sudden? So much for the game being about competing against the best I suppose. There’s even talk of Kobe testing the foreign market.

I’ve never been much of a Kobe fan. Maybe it’s because he is arrogant, smug and self-absorbed. Maybe it’s because he opted to skip college altogether rather than at least give it two or three years. Maybe it’s because of all the Michael Jordan comparisons.

Whatever it is I just don’t like him. I didn’t buy into the whole thing about him turning the page from his past transgressions. He’s selfish: period. You could tell that in the first All-Star game he appeared in. He waved off Karl Malone who was trying to set a screen for him just so he could go one on one with MJ. Malone is a legend at the power forward spot and has probably forgotten more about professionalism than Bryant has yet to learn.

He has zero rings without Shaquille O’Neal. I won’t give Shaq’s rap a whirl here, but in a way it’s pretty simple to see that Kobe ain’t much without Shaq…or any big man that can play physical.

If Kobe is so great then to solidify his legacy he needs to win a ring without Shaq and you can’t do that in Italy or Greece.

n NCAA football season is almost here. That means three certainties recently.

First, USC will get lots of media love because they have been loaded for the entire decade it seems…might ought to be some closer checks on what they’re doing to get kids to come there because last I remember Pete Carroll was pitiful at Boston College then worse at New England…hmmm…reminds me of a high school football coach in Knoxville who was plagued with all sorts of bad seasons until this decade.

Second, Ohio State will win the Big Eleven…ERRR…Ten and get all worked up about going to yet another national title game. Then they’ll be praying that Georgia, Florida, LSU, Auburn or Tennessee (or even Vanderbilt for that matter) isn’t playing them in said game. The Buckeyes can’t win against the SEC in a bowl game. 0-9 and counting and do y’all know how much I LOVE saying that to said snobbish Buckeye fans?

Third, no matter what happens to the Tennessee football team this season the “fans” will say it’s not good enough. OK. Ya know I’m used to all the nonsense that gets dished around in Cincinnati with the Reds and somewhat understanding of it with the Bengals who have no real history except two close losses in two Super Bowls in the 80s. I’m just plain fed up with it from Vol fans. It’s a never-ending cycle.

It’s time to grow up folks. Phillip Fulmer has taken the team beyond what anyone was expecting. Johnny Majors didn’t do that, he was cantankerous about his contract just five years removed from an 0-6 start and then he was shown the door when the thought that he could lose his job if he stayed home to recuperate from heart surgery then came out and lost three straight to blow a shot in the first ever SEC Championship game.

Fulmer has had his share of bumps in the road. His hair is thinning and turning a lot grayer than it was the last time I interviewed him. He’s invigorated though with a new philosophy being on board for the offense for the first time in many moons.

Dave Clawson could be the one being groomed to replace Fulmer in a few seasons. That might not set well with you because you want Fulmer out yesterday, or you think John Chavis is more deserving because he’s paid his dues, or you think outside the family isn’t a good idea.

Regardless Fulmer has more than earned the right to leave whenever he’s ready and Mike Hamilton would be smart to just let Fulmer go until he’s 60 or had 20 years at the helm and put him in the athletic department as an associate or assistant AD and go on. Otherwise he’ll risk bringing down a lot of headache on himself.